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25 July 2010 @ 04:54 pm
omfgCollapse )

21 July 2010 @ 11:47 am
I saw a movie yesterday! I saw a movie called Inception. It was the first time I saw a movie in theaters since Inglorious Basterds. But this time was much better than that time because there weren't many people there, and they turned off their phones beforehand, and they weren't hooting and hollering at the violence onscreen, and there were no funny parts for them to laugh at and then shout "HA HA THAT WAS SO FUNNY!" and then I imagine grabbing them by their scruffy bro-magnon hair and shoving their face into their popcorn so that they may suffocate and die in their buttery hell

Uhhhhh yeah anyway Inception. This is a movie by the guy who made Batman. It stars Leonardo DiCaprio, that guy who was on 3rd Rock from the Sun, that chick from Juno, the guy who was the psychic in Drag Me To Hell, and Ken Watanabe. I liked it very much. The end.
21 June 2010 @ 09:59 pm



22 May 2010 @ 01:20 pm




06 May 2010 @ 12:26 pm


To further clarify something that I was talking about earlier, I think I have a pretty good idea as to what I want to do.

It gets kind of long from here guysCollapse )
05 May 2010 @ 10:24 am
don't trust adults and more importantly don't trust whitey

lesson learned

painful, heart-ripping lesson learned

So for the third time in the past year and a half (jeezus), I'm yet again trying to look for a place to live in where I won't have to put up with fake ass motherfuckers, but on depressingly little money.

I'm also seeing what my options are for going back to school. I'm very certain that I want to get a degree in accounting this time around.

15 April 2010 @ 04:44 pm
Some people say that I'm too judgmental of others, that I'm too quick to write people off. Sometimes I wonder if I'm too harsh and if I hold a grudge for too long. There are times in my past where I've met a person and immediately had a gut feeling that I wouldn't like them/I shouldn't trust them, but I tried to push it down in the interest of suspending judgment and just being a more open person.

You want to know how many times that instinct has been wrong and I ended up getting to know a good person?


The next time I meet someone and I get that feeling about them, I'll just slit their throat then and there and save myself and everyone else the misery.
19 February 2010 @ 05:15 pm
Have I mentioned that yesterday I had to drive through Boston and not only did I manage to get in and out, but only one person honked at me (unjustly at that)?


Because I'm actually rather proud of myself.
17 February 2010 @ 12:50 pm
I keep telling myself that I'll sit down and write about all that's happened to me in the past year...but I keep putting it off. One reason being that it's so daunting; I have a good chunk of it written in a draft, but even still it barely touches on what happened.

But the primary reason is that I'm beginning to care less and less about it. The sting is going away, and though I'll never get over how badly I was insulted and how I was made to be the scapegoat -- all for the cardinal sins of being honest with my boyfriend and for actually holding people to standards -- I don't really dwell on it like I used to.

The one thing I am thankful for that was there last year is my boyfriend. I really honestly don't know how I would've gone throughout the years without him, either with him being near me in person or only through letters/calls when he was far away. I can't begin to describe how much he means to me and how much he's done for me. Maybe this is what love feels like.

I feel like I'm in another transition and it's bothering me. There's so many things I want to do with myself -- from rehauling my image to getting any sort of certification/schooling that would benefit or interest me to getting a place just for me and my bf -- and it all requires money. I can tell BF's aunt really wants us to get jobs so we can pay her rent. I know she's not just venting when she laments how high her mortgage is, I'm not dumb. But she (and a handful of others) also "encourage" me to get jobs at a Dunkin Donuts or a grocery store, and maybe I'm a snob, but I don't want to settle for something like that, even in these kind of days. I don't really have a problem with being paid peanuts, but I'd like to get my foot in somewhere and do something that I'm proud of talking about. I have skills for something more, and my mom offered to help with regards to my work history to make sure of that. I'm 24, I need to start on a path where I can climb up instead of being stuck on a plateau. I should've been doing that years ago. I don't want to work food service or low-end retail because I get extremely drained from dealing with people, and when I get home I won't want to do anything with myself in my free time. I don't want those jobs because every minute I spend at those jobs is a minute I spend getting better at something that won't translate into a future while my peers are gaining other skills and abilities that will quickly outclass me.

I signed up for the local career center. I feel optimistic about what help I could get from there. They wanted you to do an orientation before you could take part of their services, which I attended yesterday. It was basically a two-hour overview of their services and help with a CAP, career action plan. There was one guy who, in the middle, stated, "I worked at my job for 34 years, don't have a resume, don't need a resume, don't want a resume...what am I doing here?" The woman at front said gently, but matter-of-factly, "Because you're collecting unemployment." Dude, I think that given your situation, you probably DO want a resume.

If nothing else, it'll get me out of the house, at least. There isn't much to do in this town, and while there are tons of other fun towns within a short driving distance (Burlington, Reading, oh and there's this one other little town a half-hour/45 minutes away called Boston), but I feel kind of uncomfortable just going around when I have limited cash and I try to manage it so that I always have at least $20 for gas. (Dunno when I'll have to ride out, after all.) Usually the internet is a good enough way to kill time/enrich myself/LOOK FOR A JOB but we don't have internet at this house (the only reason I can get on is because the neighbors are nice enough to let us leech off of theirs...and even then their signal only reaches one room of the house) and EVERYONE wants to borrow my friggin laptop. It takes me a lot of time to collect my thoughts and concentrate on the projects that I want to, and I can't when someone asks me if they can get on to check their Facebook or if my BF gets on and he clings to the internet as much as I do. Most of the time I can really only get on for significant periods of time during the day, and even then it's kind of a stretch.

I'm so disconnected with everything ;.; I'm so sorry that I've missed out so much on all of your going ons!

And now, your moment of zen (haw):

"I think what Han Han is missing is that this failure of a movie is actually a loving tribute to the real Confucius. Just think about it for a second. Confucius himself was a failure! He failed to get noticed in Lu and had to hit the road like one of today’s Chinese exchange student; but instead of LV bags all he got was rejection. He wanted to become a powerful official and drive around in the Zhou dynasty version of the infamous White Bugatti Veyron (a red cart with four functioning wheels) but he failed to find anyone willing to listen to him when he discussed the importance of aligning your mat correctly before kneeling down. And thus he created the great precedent that those who fail at life become teachers.

"And now this director has created a movie full of historical inaccuracies, a film that misrepresents Confucius as a militarist. Why, he would be spinning in his grave it had not already been dug up and desecrated by Red Guards on holiday! But this epic failure is actually an homage to the man."